“IF I CAN FIND A CLEAN SHIRT, I MIGHT”

By Desmond Kelly ‘the Star of eLanka’

My dear readers, Could anyone of you please come up with a better “title” for a song ?. Please do not reply with the “comment”, “If I can find a clean shirt, I might”!. In these days of “same-sex” marriage, I would then ask you, “what the hell is your partner doing, not washing & ironing your shirts?. That, of course, will be asked of the “butch”partner of a homo–sexual duo. (The She/male here is supposed to do the “puluka-work”,(menial-work), right?.

My friends, I am very happy about the “yes” vote, BUT, for the life of me, I CANNOT still work out the male & female difference between these homosexual “couples”. With the “two-guy” system, the ONLY bearded lady, I thought, would be confined to “Circus-work”, so the unbearded ones must then be the “wives”. Also, even though they are “gay”, unbridled, (don’t give a damn for anyone), types, I cannot imagine which heavily bearded gay would want to be kissed by another heavily bearded gay. Those “bristles” tickle, and I cannot see how these “marriages” will last if both same-sex partners have to spend the rest of their lives tickling each other & laughing all the time. Both will have to be unbearded

I fear. This Ellen, the superb Host/ess of television is supposed to be the “butch” partner of his/her wife, Portia.

I cannot believe this. Ellen looks very much of a female to me. Does a great show, needs a very slight breast-enlargement, moves around, trying to look like a young male but is still “female” as far as I am concerned. I have seen Portia too. She is also “tiny”, very pretty & could have done much better for herself, I suppose, than Ellen.(Only joking, Ellen & Portia, I love you both).

Talking about Ellen, all T.V.Channels in Australia, please note. We have had soooo much hoo-haa about same-sex marriages, please give us a break. Enough is enough. May I request the pleasure of watching a “Hetero-sexual” wedding ceremony for every “Homo-sexual” one televised. We have to be fair, here.As in “Politics”, there should be “Transparency in Television” too. Today, I watched the very first same-sex marriage between a lesbian couple. No names, no pack drill, the “Bride” was extremely cute, but “huge” in stature, the Bride/Groom had better be careful because, if he/she misbehaved this Partner could knock him/her over with a flick of the little finger.

I’ve got to stop this now and get back to the reason of this story. They are anything BUT homo-homo-sexual, but Waylon & Willie perform this brief “tele-drama” for you folks.

Please sit back, relax & watch something you will, whether you had a clean shirt, or not. Here they are, ladies & gentlemen Waylon Jennings & Willie Nelson.

Please note. Any typo-errors regretted. D.K.