The Queen’s English has many pecularities. Here are a few of them. :-
1. If you are a “PRESBYTERIAN”, naturally, you are supposed to be “BEST IN PRAYER”- So there!
2. If you are an “ASTRONOMER”, of course, you would then be a “MOON-STARER” – What else? !
3. “DESPERATION” and “A ROPE END’S IT”- How sad!
4. Everyone has two of them. “THE EYES” and they are called so because “THEY SEE”- See? .
5. There once was an American President by the name of “GEORGE BUSH” but as for his Vice President, “HE BUGS GORE” – So there goes Gore.!
6. If you were a Signal-man in the Royal Ceylon Navy, as my good friend Denis Roberts was, you probably used “THE MORSE CODE” & “HERE COME THE DOTS” !.
7. I do remember the “DORMITORY” in the R.Cy.Navy & indeed, it was a “DIRTY ROOM” – for one reason or another.
8. Go to any Club in Australia and there you’ll find a few “SLOT MACHINES”, one of whom will sneer as he tells you about the “CASH LOST IN ME”! Agree?.
9. A hostile spirit of “ANIMOSITY” could never attain Nirvana because he will find that there “IS NO AMITY” there & no wonder? He does’nt deserve it.
10. After the recent “ELECTION RESULTS”a cry went out “LIES, LET’S RECOUNT” !! and they did. Same result.
11. I have never had any use for “SNOOZE-ALARMS” but without them, many say “ALAS, NO MORE Z’S”.
12. “A DECIMAL POINT” says “I’M A DOT IN PLACE”.
13. We have this thing about “THE EARTHQUAKES”. We have all felt “THAT QUEER SHAKE” sometimes! .
14. “ELEVEN PLUS TWO”-“TWELVE PLUS ONE” get it ?.
15. I was extremely lucky to have a very good one, but a “MOTHER-IN-LAW” is usually a “WOMAN- HITLER”. ” get that in your pipe and smoke it”
Fascinating, most important International Language in the World. Where would we be without it?
and yet, there came the Internet and one could soon forget the very “basics” of this fine “tongue” Everyone now writes “e’mails”, most of them consist of two or three words. In “my day” as a beautiful old song said,
“Three little words” simply mean’t “I love you”. Not so, today. Speling is atrocious. “Wud u put on your shu ?,
I now do quote a famous Shakesperian riddle, saying
” If one inserted the summits of their digits into yonder concavities in order to extract a miniscule conglamoration of pulvarized atoms to be then re-inserted into their nasal apetures, what in the hell would one be doing? . If you are reading this on elanka
please give my your answers in the “comments .
column. First in, best dressed. I will send you a personalized CD for your trouble.
Desmond ( Kelly from Colombo ).