Forgive – by Oscar E V Fernando

Forgive – by Oscar E V Fernando

Oscar FernandoWhat does it mean-to forgive?

Is it to stop being angry with or pardon a person who has wronged you, there being a long list of words describing forgiveness such as-excuse-exonerate-absolve-acquit-all sounding legalistic and derivations from legal statutes-or verdicts of a bench of judges-others like-let go of-not feel resentful-not feel vengeful-connote equanimity and calmness of temper arising from the spirit within-conceptualizing natural justice or equity!

The writer opines-that the person who believes he is created in the image and likeness of the creator-described as the Source and Fountain of Love-it would appear that forgiveness is easier to him than to the person who does not believe that love is so etched in his being-for such a person is more likely to take instant revenge-like the immediate reaction of an animal that would swipe and kill another-on being attacked-this is a general aspersion

To the former-bearing the grudge without forgiving is like allowing a splinter to remain in his-eye ever unnaturally irritating him and is eager to be rid of-soon-but for the latter the irritating splinter is nurtured till it festers into a wound

Psychologists say forgiveness is a deliberate decision to release feelings of resentment or vengeance towards another who has harmed you, regardless of whether he actually deserves your forgiveness-like Christ from his cross forgiving his crucifiers

It is traditionally admonished-to forgive and forget

but can one forget a wrong done against you?

For example, if you are slapped by someone in front of an audience-will you be able to forget that incident- you may turn the other cheek as a willful choice and a gesture of instantly forgiving him-but-but will your photogenic mind “dis-enclave” the painful slap from the gesture of forgiveness?

No!

does it imply that you have not forgiven him?

No!

in forgiving you singularly let go of vengefulness-say, at the very moment of turning the other cheek and it is a willful gesture-coming from your free will stamped in you at creation

some do not comprehend this separation and thereby perpetuate the hatred for the slap-in a continued state of unforgiveness

If you bring to the foe the scene of the slap and allow it to fester each time it is brought up-with ideas of revenge and vengeance the splinter in your eye will soon end up in a sore eye-oozing with pus

on the other hand, if you release the concept of forgetting from the concept forgiving-and go on lovingly forgiving-you will soon realize you have set a prisoner free-and that-the prisoner so released is none other than you-yourself-

listen to the song accompanying this piece!

Also-read admonishments of these great minds-

heat not a furnace for your foe so hot that it will singe you said Shakespeare-

let’s never try to get even with our enemies, because if we do, we will hurt ourselves far more than we hurt them-said General Eisenhower-

let’s never waste a minute thinking about people we don’t like-when we hate our enemies, we are giving them power over us: power over our sleep, our appetites, our blood pressure, our health, and our happiness-let’s not allow ourselves to be upset by small things we should despise and forget- remember-life is too short to be little-

most of all-do not let your enemy dance with joy-to see you suffering-with that splinter in your eye-caused by him!

the same applies to communities in a nation that cannot see eye to eye and blindly continue warring to its own self-destruction

Let us consider an opinion-on our own country-glossing over stages of discontent over the years-

·   Thirties-community in the north wanted a power devolution for no apparent reason

·   Forties Minorities were enjoying plums of office for religious and linguistic reasons

·   Fifties retaliatory actions on minorities

·   Sixties most of private sector economy was nationalized

·   Seventies simmering cold war bludgeoning into a furious war by nineties

·   twenties continuation of turmoil 

·   presently building up another cold war

When will they ever realize that both parties could even now-discuss-repent-forgive and mutually remove that splinter from their eye?

None so blind as those who willfully do not wish to see!

Oscar E V Fernando

May 2021

“More on forgiveness”

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