“SIGNS OF THE TIMES” by Des Kelly

As we go around this mad World, we sometimes come across “signs” that are just as crazy. If the following make you smile, I’ll consider it worthwhile. Here we go, then.

“Toilet out of order. Please use floor below”
In a Laundromat- “Automatic Washing Machines. Please remove all your clothes, when the light goes out”

In a London Department Store-“Bargain Basement Upstairs”
In an Office-” Would the person who took the step-ladder yesterday, please bring it back, or further steps will be taken”

In another Office-‘ After tea-break, Staff should empty the teapot, and stand upside-down on draining board”
Outside a “second-hand” Shop- “We swap anything. Bicycles, Washing Machines etc., why not bring your wife along and get a wonderful bargain”?
In a “Health-food” shop window- “Closed due to illness”
On a “Safari-Park” gate-“Elephants, please stay in your car”
During a Conference-“For anyone here who has children and don’t know it, there is a “Day-Care” on the 1st floor”

On the gate of a Farm-” The farmer permits walkers to cross this farm for free, but the bull charges”
On a “Leaflet”- “If you cannot read, this leaflet will tell you how to get lessons”
On a “repair-shop” door- “We can repair anything, (please knock hard on the door-the bell doesn’t work”.

desmond kelly