“OUR COCK-EYED WORLD” by Desmond Kelly ‘the Star of eLanka’

A terrible thing to say, I suppose, but it IS a cockeyed (cross-eyed), call it what you “like-eyed” World, we are living in, at the moment. It has GOT to be something in the air. 

Just a short time ago, in this particular season of “Spring”, in Australia, the only ones who had to worry would have been the hay-fever sufferers. Bushels of pollen, floating in the air, would now be preferable to the “bull-dust” flying around, at the moment, in Australia. In Lanka, it would be powdered, dried “Cow-dung”.

A “hole” in the o-zone layer around Earth, has suddenly become a hole blasted into the sun!.How anything got close enough to the sun, to blast a hole in it, is anybody’s guess.

Maybe “Google” did it. They can do anything, I believe.

Besides this, if there IS a big hole in the sun, we would not have to worry about “climate-change”, would we ?. It would immediately become “colder”, the “ice-bergs” would begin to reform, our “Ship-Captains” would have to be extra-vigilant in order to prevent possible collisions & carry MANY MORE Life-boats to save more passengers than did the “Titanic”.

World War 3 is about to commence, next week.! It’s Beginning to look a lot like Christmas, an old Xmas-type song, & our favourite “Rocket-Men” are getting their crazy

“fireworks” ready to show the World, who’s boss. This “War” has been “in the making” now, for about 3 YEARS !. The mere fact that this 3rd World War may NEVER start is the only good thing about all the rubbish that is now going on.!

If it does, however, please remember, all you thousands of 

eLanka readers, that I, the * of our main Website, have given you prior warning. If you DO hear any “Howling-Siren” sounding off,suddenly, for no friggin reason whatsoever, as far as you are concerned, grab the first “dining-table” CHAIR available, sit on it, leaning as far forward & under it, as humanly possible, and then kiss your arse goodbye. I am truly sorry, but this will be much easier to do if you are a contorsionist, (as the beautiful “plastic-girl” Lily Jenkins,was, or, like me, you have “Ankylosin Spondylitis” which is a slow deterioration of the spinal-cord. Don’t say that I didn’t tell you, because, if this bloody war starts, I will not be able to write you any more warnings & you will not be able to read them, either.! We will all be joining our mates like a certain Aussie Cardinal in Hell, oops, I mean’t Heaven(hopefully),

Another extremely good prospect for Australia, is that, in the near future, NO-ONE will be able to start a Government.

There will be “hung-Parliments” hanging around, all over the place, because nobody will know whether they are “dual” Citizens, or even perhaps, “triple” Citizens, Constitutions will all have to be re-written, laws & “Courtrooms” handed over completely to the convicted criminals in order that they could further criminalize & victimize their own victims of crime.Right now, these poor “Crims” are the “victims, “& deserve much longer “stays” in our 4-star prisons, so that they can be re-habilitated, go out on early parole, simply to re-offend so that they can go back to their “hotel-room”.

“Junior” crime is on the mend. The crims are getting younger each year, leaving home & family so they can do their “own thing”, go out & bash these pesky old-timers & steal their handbags directly from their wheelchairs which are a real menace on our public Streets. The way to go, I say. I would like to write much more, but sarcasm has always been a “weak-point”, as far as I am concerned.

     However, leaving aside the “topics” mentioned so far, the “SQUINT” gets even worse as I go along. Long, long before Einstine or Winestein or whatever his name was, we have to remember the Aussie-Entertainer who had three (3) legs. He wasn’t shy about showing-off all three of them, but here”s the rub.!  When he was “seated”, as he was, quite often, just as a famous “garden-guru” of our “latest” breaking news was, why did certain young ladies choose to sit on the knees of these very bad men ?. Why did sooo many pretty young “wannabe-actresses” go to bed with their “Producers, Directors, & other “Studio big-shots”, practically from the time they started making movies ?. WHY ?, you ask. Well, let me tell you. These poor girls were soo tired, chasing after these horrid men, they just had to get some sleep, thats why

The men joined them & stopped them from getting their ” beauty-sleep & to make up for it, promised them either “leading roles” or “bit-parts” depending on whose “sleep” they had so rudely broken. Movies were made, Parts were played, years went by, no complaints made, decades later, out they come, sexual ‘harrasment’ is in the gun. “We’re now getting older,”these pretty girls say, “so now, let’s harrass THEM & get OUR WAY”!!. Feminism is alive & well.

Back to the “Rocket-men” for the final time, before I go onto the ultimate story in this “cockeyed article”. Just watching the morning news on the A.B.C., (even as I write this), we are told that another rocket has been “fired”by “kaata kiyanda the bung”(translation:- “who to tell, men”?), & the President of the U.S.A., answers with another “grump” that he will take care of it. The cockeyed fact of the matter is that, as long as these missiles “go up” 20.000 kilometres or so, break-up & fall into the sea near Japan, why worry about them ?. For the broken bits that stay up-there, “old Blighty” is in the process of sending “up” another rocket with a “debris-cleaning thing-a-ma-bob to capture & destroy all the space-junk around this cockeyed Planet of ours. We can now “put -on a “serious face” because Britain now rules all our “Space”

   Sorry readers, I am now getting cockeyed trying to remember what my “final-subject” is, oh, yes, it is about the fact that the same-sex marriage legislation is about to be “passed” before Christmas, this year. Now, for the best new cockeyed news for 2018. This young guy, with his pretty young wife & two young children are walking along a busy Street in Melbourne. He wanted to do this around xmas/17, but felt rather odd about it, & he was so right. As he & his family passed the homes in Suburbia, he could “feel” the sniggers & almost hear the whispers of the people. “Look, look”, they said, in unison (I think), “doesn’t that young man look rather queer”. So much for our cockeyed World for the moment. As I say quite often, please excuse any typo–errors. I tend to write most of my stuff during the early hours of the morning, completely off the top of my cockeyed head & “mistakes” are sometimes made, because of it. Also, although my “English” is pretty good, most times, I do make some quier speling misstakes at od times, so if my readers “see something” please make a bloody comment. Do join us on eLanka, doesn’t matter if you’re gay, bi-sexual,  trans-sexual , or, on the other hand, even “queer”,

Join us to learn a bit more about “OUR COCKEYED WORLD”

Desmond Kelly

Star of eLanka.