Check Your Couple relationship with these simple Tips – By Nisal Rukshan
Even when we are born alone—just milliseconds out of the womb—relationships grow. It’s becoming more complex with different interactions. Relationships with parents, siblings, relatives, and friends give some wider social explanations to individuals. Most of these interactions include the essence of love plus and minus according to status.
According to the American Psychologist Association (ACA), love is “a complex emotion involving strong feelings of affection and tenderness for the love object, pleasurable sensations in his or her presence, devotion to his or her well-being, and sensitivity to his or her reactions to oneself. Although love takes many forms, including concern for one’s fellow humans (brotherly love), parental love, erotic love, self-love, and identification with the totality of being (love of God), the triangular theory of love proposes three essential components: passion, intimacy, and commitment.”
Since this is a complex thing to explain deeply and briefly, today we are here to discuss points to remember and practice for better couple relationships.
Give Respect and Gain
In any relationship, mutual respect is important. Despite educational level, occupation, social status, etc. Show your respect honestly, and then you will get it back.
Show your real self.
In a relationship, never attempt to show something far beyond yourself. Because you will never be able to keep the same. Then show really who you are. If it’s appropriate, then the connection will remain with understanding.
appreciate your partner.
Be a person with an appreciative attitude. Say you are very beautiful; that’s great; it’s very nice; you did it excellently, by any means. Then it will highly positively affect your relationships.
Allocate some time for them.
We are running for 24 hours. Due to official commitments, we may be very busy with occupations. In the meantime, it affects our relationships negatively. But you can avoid this with present technological equipment in seconds, like sending SMS, voice messages, short calls, sending a picture, etc. But it needs to be generated by yourself, with your commitment and interest. Show your commitment to the relationship beyond words.
Care for them with attention.
Care about your relationship with positivity. Pay attention and be mindful of the couple’s goals for the future. Never let anyone feel he or she never cares about me or is less caring.
Talk openly
During some relationships, there are some places where each needs to have clear doubts. On such occasions, talk openly. If it’s possible, sit together and have better eye contact. Openly talk about what you want to ask or what you want to say.
Have some personal, constructive criticism if needed.
Relationships are not always smoothly functioning. There are some points where each needs criticism. As such, there are some constructive criticisms in between for better relationships (only between couples, no third-party involvement). Understand each important point and avoid heated arguments.
Always be loyal.
Be loyal to your partner. Have transparency during movements. Do not tell lies, even though your partner may feel anger for some duration with your truth, but continue with reality followed by lessons learned.
Try to be creative.
Creativity doesn’t mean that you want to do something excellent. It refers to doing something to break the monotony. It may be a way of talking, a way of expressing love, celebrating birthdays, writing letters, sending voice messages, or any
Try to understand situations.
Always understand situations; some relationships create unpleasant situations due to misunderstandings. Hence, always have a broad view of situations and the roles of partners. Even if you feel uncomfortable, discuss those with your partner, and then come for a win-win situation.
Don’t go beyond your limitations until the time comes.
Relationships don’t mean that partners can control each other as per preference. Hence, it needs to understand the limitations of each. That may be financial, social, cultural, mental, physical, or any
Do small things to make him or her happy, but don’t expect the same.
Doing small things doesn’t mean not doing bigger things; yes, if you are capable, you can do wonders. But don’t expect the same thing from your partner. We must understand that even if we were partners, there are some biological, mental, personality, or many individual differences. Play your role with good faith and care.
Avoid schemas, prejudices, and stereotypes.
This means you need to have mindfulness in a relationship. Hence Avoid schemas; prejudices and stereotypes may lead you to a series of conclusions about a matter. My past experiences repeatedly happen, which may cause sudden conclusions with schemas. Think of every situation as a new one for various reasons.
Always have discussions for the next step.
This will show and enhance the capacity of your relationship. Discuss each new step with confidence. Improve trust and respect among you through equality.
Always use your brain, not your emotions, during decision-making.
Be aware of your emotions. When making decisions, always use your brain. It doesn’t say to be strict; no, you can be flexible with real understanding, even up to some extent. This will benefit long-term relationships with confidence.
Do not seek short-term pleasure.
If you are in a real relationship, never seek short-term pleasure. This must concern bonds like sexual intercourse, the use of alcohol, the use of substances, etc. Especially read each other; don’t let anyone use you for short-term pleasure. If you feel it’s growing up to harassment in a relationship, that is the best time to re-think.
Understand his or her personal space.
Even in strong relationships, there is a special place called personal space. This personal space creates human balance and frees them from all other outside mental influences. Hence, understand the personal space of each and then respect it (examples like closing the door and staying in a room after an argument and memorizing all incidents).
Always try to have a feeling of togetherness. Between
Most relationships lie in words, but even with words, they have a significant impact on life. For example, may your partner go for a long drive in a self-driven car? May you be very busy with your important work, but to keep the warmth and feel togetherness, just send some SMS, voice message, message, picture, or even a missed call to show your emotional bonds. Always think you are not busy every second, like not allocating a few seconds to keep the bond warm. It shows the interest in both hearts.
There are many tips there to have strong couple relationships, but these few points will guide you more to know each other, followed by a better inter-relationship as a real means of “a healthy couple relationship”.
Nisal Rukshan MHRM, BA (Defence), BSc (Hons.) Counselling Psychology, DCPsy
Email: rukshan4slsr@gmail.com
