MAGGOT-MEMORIES” – by Des Kelly
To begin with the customary Congratulations to the Australian of the year for 2023, Ms.Olympia Yarger, who, among other creditable efforts, now adds the management of maggots, in a bid to the final effect of Climate-change, that our World is seeking at this very moment. Who would have thought that maggots would be necessary for this ultra-important task, and Australian maggots at that !!. Anyway, if there is ANY Country that could boast accomplishnents of this calibre, believe me, AUSTRALIA CAN!!.
Talking about Aussie-Mags., my memories of these little insects come from one of my MANY experiences as an Ordinary Australian Man or O.A.M., (call me what you will), & I have been called other ‘names’ as well, being the ultimate
“No problem” type of volunteer, willing to take on ANY type of job for the purpose of earning this little bit of extra money, with which to feed my family.
I was working for A Security Company at the time. Apologies, but I cannot remember which one it was. It was over a weekend and I had already done my usual shifts, when they called me to find out whether I could drive down to a large shopping centre down South, where a bunch of larrikins were causing a major hassle and chasing would-be shoppers out to do their shopping elsewhere. I said “yes, no problem, but just have a pistol ready for me to pick up, in case I had to defend myself” They agreed, and I soon found myself at this shopping centre, where a gang of around eight or nine hooligans were still annoying the folk around them, as I walked in.
I spoke to a couple of elderly males who informed me that this ‘gang’ was going around the Centre making a damn nuisance of themselves, and their leader was known as MAGGOT.
I considered my next move very carefully, pulled my pistol halfway out of my uniform belt holster just to make it plainly visible, walked over to a member of the gang in question and spoke to him quite gently, as I remember, when I said,
“Go find your Maggot, round up the rest of your mob, then get the hell out of this shopping/centre and NEVER come back here”.
The young lout, still looking like the dishevelled teenager that he possibly was, looked at me, in full uniform, with one eye on the butt of the gun
snuggled in it’s leather holster, and without saying a word walked away to find Maggot and give him my message.
About ten minutes later I saw Maggot and his bunch of hooligans walking slowly out of the Centre. The two elderly gents I/had spoken to earlier came over to me and said “that’s them, mate, good job, cobber”.
The following week, I got the news that Maggot and his gang had not been seen at this Centre since and had possibly moved to another Suburb. The crux of this TRUE story is simply this. There are TWO different types of Maggots in our world. I cannot truthfully say I like either.
Desmond Kelly. (Mr.Music)
(Editor-in-Chief). e’Lanka.
