“PUNS ARE FUN. HEARD THIS ONE? “

by Desmond Kelly ‘the Star of eLanka”

Crime is on the increase ( so, what’s new ), and the Authorities seem to be powerless in the face of it, yet all our Governments have to do is Nationalize it, and then it will NEVER pay for itself.

My uncle Bill was a “crook”, a pick-pocket, actually, but he was also extremely short-sighted and ended up picking pockets in a “nudist-camp”, he was really at the bottom then, & some people will go to any lengths to avoid theft.

Come to think of it, I once knew a man with a “bad leg”, named Arthur. Sorry Art., I don’t know the name of the other one. He was a Lankan and introduced me to his sister. He said “do you know my sister May? , I said ” no, but thanks for the tip”. Arthur owned a bakery in Lunawa, quite close to the sea, but found it very difficult to stop the seagulls swooping down and bowling his seeni-bunnis off the counter & eating them. He tried everything. He even “adopted” a dog, but everytime he shouted it it ” Attack, Ronaya”, Ronaya had an “attack”. He was losing money, hand over fist, and, as you know, a baker always kneads the dough, but he used his loaf and hired a huge gander to scare-off the seagulls. He wasn’t the goose everyone thought he was. This didn’t work either, so Art went to see his psychiatrist. That’s the fellow you talk to before you start talking to yourself.
The psychiatrist said ” hello, what seems to be the trouble here? ” Art replied “nobody seems to hear a word I’m saying”, to which his psychiatrist said “hello,
what seems to be the trouble here?”, which goes to prove that PUNS ARE FUN.

Desmond Kelly. K.F.C., A.F.E.
“Kelly From Colombo, Star of e’ Lanka”
“Ambassador For Everything”.
P.S. Only joking. Better see my own “Shrink” I think. D.K